YMUG Newsletter – 2016/09/18
Tony Crockford: firstname.lastname@example.org
Chris Brady: email@example.com
with help from: Anzir Boodoo and Tim Pinder. Thanks also to Ian Thomas, Martin Pickering and Brendan Rowland who send me items of interest.
Items for the newsletter . . . reviews, rants, raves, revelations and reflections to: Jerad Zimmermann, your participatory social mores editor: firstname.lastname@example.org
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NEXT YMUG MEETING:
Here’s a list of some topics that Steve or I can talk about for our next meeting:
iTunes (its uses and abuses),
Cloud based sync and backup services,
using text expansion (in-built and specialist apps),
Automator.(what it is and isn’t how to build an automation workflow/service/app),
a look at Preview and what you can do with it,
general productivity apps and approaches – to do lists, note taking, etc,
security basics (passwords & password management, touch ID, encryption incl. File Vault, ZIP passwords, document passwords, etc., being safe online, phishing, etc).
Let me know (email@example.com) if any of the topics are of particular interest. Or if there’s something else you’d like to learn about.
I figure the next meeting should be ‘up North’ so . . . Bedale okay with everyone? Sometime in December or January? I want to wait until the newest version of OS X/macOS and iOS 10 arrive.
OS X AND MAC STUFF
Not much OS X news this week what with the release of iOS 10 and the iPhone 7s going on sale. But, be forwarned: macOS Sierra is coming on on Tuesday so expect some disruption in Apple services.
iTunes got an update this last week so it can play nicely with iOS 10. There was only one change I noticed and it was a good one!
One of those ‘keeper’ articles: how to migrate to a new Mac.
Why some people are still using OS 9.
iOS 10 was released this last week suitable for iPhone 5s and newer; here’s a comprehensive review from Ars Technica. I updated my iPhone 6 very early and I haven’t had any problems. In fact, a lot of things look pretty much the same.
I always update my phone via iTunes but some people who updated ‘over-the-air’ had problems which Apple quickly fixed. Also there was an initial problem with T-Mobile but that too has been corrected.
Here’s a list of 100 + new iOS 10 features! I guess there’s a lot of stuff I didn’t notice!
If you have updated to iOS 10 you may have noticed that you can now send handwritten messages. I haven’t tried it ‘cause my family members haven’t taken the plunge yet.
You may also notice that the lock screen options have changed. Here’s some help with that.
And Control Center has also changed.
Some folks are finding that their batteries are draining faster after updating to iOS 10. This can be happening for a variety of reasons, background app refresh is a common culprit. Here’s some suggestions of things to check.
And here’s a lengthy review of the iPhone 7 and 7+. I probably won’t get one although it is my birthday this week . . .
By most tests an iPhone 7 is faster than every Macbook Air ever made.
Already people are asking how to reset an iPhone 7 and activate Device Firmware Upgrade (which I’m not familiar with).
I’d love to work for iFixit. It must be fun tearing apart iPhones. Here’s their articles on the iPhone 7: http://ifixit.org/blog/8391/iphone-7-teardown/
And the iPhone 7+: http://ifixit.org/blog/8383/iphone-7-plus-teardown/
Some other folks have been bending iPhones 7s and dropping them in hot coffee to see how they handle some rough treatment. They do quite well apparently.
Oddly enough, some iPhone 7s are reported to be making hissing noises when under load.
WWW = WEIRD, WONDERFUL AND WHY
If you’ve still got an Apple II then you might want to update ProDOS as someone is still working on it!!
Apple was denied planning permission for its Regent Street shop when they wanted to put in some flagpoles with lights.
Apple also filed a patent for a . . . paper bag?
You’ve heard of the exploding Samsung Note 7 phones? Samsung has bitten the bullet and recalled them all. But, of course, some people don’t want to hand in their phones. So Samsung is going to put out a firmware update that will limit batteries to 60%.
Microsoft says their Edge browser is nicer to your battery than Chrome, Opera or Firefox.
Russia bans porn sites and advices users to meet someone in real life.
Catalytic converter theft is a real issue.
I suppose if I wanted an adult colouring book I might get a Wonder Woman one. Might.
I think I’ll pass on a Star Wars waffle maker.
But a set of measuring cups that look like R2D2, that I’ll have.
If you’re going to try and extort money from a big company it’s probably not recommended that you put your address on the demand letter.
September 18th is the 262nd day of this leap year (the year of The Donald?) and is the international World Water Monitoring Day.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY to: Samuel Johnson (b 1709, d 1784), Greta Garbo (b 1905, d 1990), voice of Rocky the Flying Squirrel June Foray (b 1917), actor Jack Warden (b 1920, d 2006), victim of Lee Harvey Oswald JD Tippit (b 1924, d 1963), actor Robert Blake (b 1933), snooker player John Spencer (b 1935, d 2006), singer Frankie Avalon (b 1940), Mo Mowlam (b 1949, d 2005), Peter Shilton (b 1949), Dee Dee Ramone (b 1951, d 2002), author Steven Pinker (b 1954), actor James Gandolfini (b 1961, d 2013), actress Tara Fitzgerald (b 1967), Darren Gough (b 1970), Lance Armstrong (b 1971).
Rest in peace these folks who died on September 18th: awesome mathematician Leonhard Euler (b 1707, d 1783), the wizard in The Wizard of Oz Frank Morgan (b 1890, d 1949), Dag Hammarskjold (b 1905, d 1961), Jimi Hendrix (b 1942, d 1970), author Katherine Anne Porter (b 1890, d 1980).
Some notable events that took place on September 18th: Harald Hardrada lands on the beaches of Scarborough (1066), Christopher Columbus lands on Honduras (1501), George I arrives in Great Britain (1714), the Royal Opera House opens (1809), Tiffany and Co is founded (1837), The Netherlands give women the right to vote (1919), the American network CBS begins broadcasting (1927), Lord Haw-Haw begins broadcasting (1939), the CIA is established (1947), satellite Vanguard 3 is launched (1959), US soap opera The Guiding Light ends after 72 years, wow (2009), Scotland votes against independence (2014).
“Do you think Hillary looks presidential? I don’t think so. And I’m not going to say it, because I’m not allowed to say it because I want to be politically correct.”
— Donald Trump
“[Hillary Clinton] could walk into this arena right now and shoot somebody, with 20,000 people watching, right smack in the middle of the heart, and she wouldn’t be prosecuted.”
— Donald Trump
“I don’t know. Was it a birth certificate? You tell me. Some people say that was not his birth certificate. I’m saying I don’t know. Nobody knows.”
— Donald Trump in 2013, two years after President Obama released his long form birth certificate
“I don’t know. I really don’t know.”
— Trump, asked if he thinks Obama was born in the U.S., 2015
“I’ll answer that question at the right time. I just don’t want to answer it yet.”
— Trump, asked this week by the Washington Post if he still believes Obama was not born in the U.S.
“As a businessman and a very substantial donor to very important people, when you give, they do whatever the hell you want them to do.”
— Donald Trump, 2015
“I’ve given to everybody. Because that was my job. I gotta give to them… Because when I want something, I get it. When I call, they kiss my ass.”
— Trump, 2016
“One more example of Hillary Clinton’s catastrophic failures as secretary of state.”
— Donald Trump on North Korea nuke test
“What I would do very simply is say, ‘China, this is your baby. This is your problem. You solve the problem.’ China can solve that problem.”
— Trump on North Korea
“Of course it’s legal. It’s a war. Until the war is over, anything is legal.”
— Rudy Giuliani, lawyer and former U.S. attorney, defending Donald Trump’s assertion that the U.S. should have seized Iraq’s oilfields after the 2003 invasion
Zhang Ming, the general manager of a travel company in Jinan City, in Shandong Province, China, required employees to take turns reading his posts on Sina Weibo over a loudspeaker, and everyone was required to comment on the posts. Weibo is a Twitter-like web site. Most of the comments are an emoji meaning “Like”, but Zhang wasn’t satisfied with the level of comments, and fined more than 200 employees 50 yuan (US$6.50) each. Such fines are illegal in China. Zhang refused to comment to a reporter, but issued a statement that his company’s success was due to “a shared mind and strong execution abilities,” and the employees “needed mentoring” to increase morale. (RC/China Daily)
Jeffrey Osella, 50, and his neighbour have had regular disputes over the last 13 years, says interim Police Chief Shawn Lacey in Westerly, N.H. In the latest incident, the two got into a shouting match, and Osella allegedly responded by using a potato gun to shoot corncobs at his neighbour’s house. The neighbour told officers he had recently put his house up for sale, and he was concerned about Osella damaging the property or hindering a sale. Police went to Osella’s house where, according to the report, he answered the door shirtless — with several corn kernels stuck to his chest. He denied shooting at the neighbour, but allegedly admitting firing “towards” the neighbour’s home. He was arrested on charges of disorderly conduct, and “firing in a compact area.” (MS/Westerly Sun)
Residents in downtown Milan, Italy, heard weird construction-like sounds at night. “We began hearing noises on Sunday evening,” said one resident. “We were jokingly saying to each other, ‘Are they robbing the bank?’” Indeed, the sounds got closer and closer to a neighbourhood bank. “On Monday one of us went to the bank to warn them about the tremors we had felt. Others went to the nearest police station on Tuesday because the sounds had not stopped.” Bank and police officials blew off the warnings — until bank employees arrived to find someone inside, who forced them to open the safe and safety deposit boxes. The robbers escaped through their tunnel before police arrived. (RC/AFP)
Michael O. Murphy, 68, went to a neighbour in Davison Township, Mich., to ask for a favour. “I got to get rid of this,” Murphy told Duane Morrish, because “it’s starting to smell.” He had tried to cut up the body of a man he had shot, but it had proven more difficult than he anticipated, and it was still in his garden shed. Could Morrish help him dump the body in a county park? Morrish figured Murphy was joking, but when he accepted the keys to the garden shed and took a look, he went to the police. Murphy is charged with first-degree murder, and faces life in prison. (RC/Flint Journal)
A thief in Paris made plans to steal some paintings from The Louvre. After careful planning he got past security, stole the paintings and made it safely to his van. However he was captured just two blocks away after his van ran out of gas. When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error of not having gas in his van, he replied. ”Monsieur,that is the reason I stole the paintings. I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh.” Now do you have De Gaulle to send this on to someone else? I sent it to you because I figured I had nothing Toulouse.
What is the definition of a good tax accountant? Someone who has a loophole named after him.
Why do accountants make good lovers? They’re great with figures.
What is the definition of “accountant”? Someone who solves a problem you didn’t know you had in a way you don’t understand.
Why did God invent economists? So accountants could have someone to laugh at.
Why accountants don’t read novels? Because the only numbers in them are page numbers.
What’s an actuary? An accountant without the sense of humour.
What does an accountant use for birth control? His personality.
What’s the difference between the male sperm and an accountant? The sperm has a 1 in 250,000 chance of becoming human.
A 54-year-old accountant leaves a letter for his wife one evening which read: “Dear Wife, I am 54 years old, and by the time you get this letter I will be at the Grand Hotel with my beautiful and sexy eighteen year old secretary.”
When he arrived at the hotel, there was a letter waiting for him that read as follows: “Dear Husband, I too am 54 years old, and by the time you receive this letter I will be at the Savoy Hotel with my eighteen year old boy toy. Because you are an accountant, you will surely appreciate that l8 goes into 54 many more times than 54 goes into 18.”
Two accountants go to their credit union on their lunch break, when armed robbers burst in. While several of the robbers take the money from the tellers, others line the customers, including the accountants, up against a wall, and proceed to take their wallets, watches, and other valuables.
While this is going on accountant number one jams something in accountant number two’s hand.
Without looking down, accountant number two whispers, “What is this?”
Accountant number one replies, “it’s that $50 I owe you.”
I used to live in South Dakota (I’m not bragging, I’m complaining) and I don’t remember a town called Plenty Bears. I wonder if these goofy US town names are real?
A woman is in an accident while she’s pregnant. While in a comma she has twins (a boy & a girl). When she woke up she asked the doctor where her baby was.
The doctor said she had twins but her brother named them.
She replied,”My brother is an idiot I wonder what names he gave them. Anyway what did he name the girl?”
“Denise”, replied the doctor.
“That’s not so bad. What about the boy”, she finally asked.
One day God came to Adam for a brief discussion. “I’ve got some good news and some bad news.” God said.
Adam looked thoughtfully at his maker and replied, “Please give me the good news first.”
Smiling, God explained, “I’ve created two new organs for you. One is called a brain. This organ will allow you to be very intelligent, create new things, and carry on productive conversations with Eve. The other organ is called a penis. It will allow you to reproduce your intelligent life form and begin populating the planet. Eve will be very pleased that you are now equipped with this organ as she will be able to conceive children.”
Adam, very excited, exclaimed, “These are great and wonderful gifts you have given me. What could possibly be bad news after such great tidings?”
God then looked upon Adam, and said with great sorrow, “The bad news is I only gave you enough blood to operate one of these organs at a time.”
Looks like it might be a lovely day near York. Yeah!! I wonder if I can get a bit more lawn mowed . . .